Some of the most common questions I get from clients, friends and loved ones are about WHAT they should be eating.

What should I eat for more energy? What should I eat for weight loss? What should I eat for my digestive issues? What should I eat for my chronic health issue?

It’s a lifelong question because the answer is unique to each of us, and it changes as we do.

But HOW to eat…

For enjoyment

For freedom

For everyday vitality, health and happiness

It’s a question very few people think to ask.

I feel sad about this because the answer to this question holds the key to so many health and weight issues.

Because HOW we eat directly impacts…

How much pleasure we derive from our meal

How well we digest our food

How satisfied we feel after eating

How well our body assimilates what we’ve eaten

How vibrant and alive we feel during and after a meal

If you are someone who has been dieting or “watching your weight” for years, chances are you don’t know how to eat without engaging the dieting mindset which, in one form or another says: “I’m not allowed to eat”.

It takes time to retrain your body and mind to understand that food is your friend.

Even if you’re not a seasoned dieter, many of us didn’t grow up with healthy examples of how to eat.

What would it be like to rediscover the joyful eating you knew as a young child, and to break up with the dieting mindset for good?

If you struggle with yo-yo or chronic dieting, digestive issues, or feeling like you’re in a constant war with food and/or emotional eating, learning how to eat will support you in many ways.

Here are some of my evergreen guidelines for how to eat. They work for everyone, at any age and every life phase.

1. Slow down when you eat. In the US, especially, we’ve gotten into the habit of eating on the go, standing up, or in the car. Many of my clients eat their meals very quickly. Slowing down when you eat will give your body and brain a chance to catch up with what you’re doing. This leads to greater fulfillment and satiety when you eat. Nourishment happens at a slower pace. So, sit down when you eat. Make mealtime an experience when you notice your food, your surroundings, and yourself.
2. Breathe. The body can either be in a stressed out state OR digest food. It can’t do both. This is why when we’re stressed out or emotional we might not feel hungry, or we feel like we’ve been kicked in the gut. Our digestion has slowed down or stopped. Taking 3 deep inhales and exhales can calm your nervous system in significant ways. When your nervous system is calm, your digestive fire turns on to help you digest better. Breathing also helps you get present in the moment, and amps up your metabolism so your body can better use the food you are eating as fuel.
3. Notice who you are being as an eater while you eat. There are so many different aspects of who we are that can show up anytime we grab something to eat. Who are you being when you sit to eat? The part of you that wants to eat chips for dinner (aka The Rebellious Teen)? Or the part of you that’s counting calories and carbs (The Judge and/or Critic)? The you that wants to nurture you with wholesome foods (The Nurturing Mother)? Or the you that wants to numb out (The Addict)? Take a moment and notice who is eating when you sit to eat. You can call forth the part of you that makes healthy, self-honoring decisions and make choices according to what she would want for you. When you bring awareness to who you are being when you eat, you get to choose.
4. Eat at regular intervals throughout the day. Your body is very rhythmic and cyclical in nature. Your heartbeat, your respiration, even your hormones and nervous system – everything about the body is rhythmic. The body goes into a stress response when its blood sugar begins to drop, and it doesn’t know where its next meal is coming from. If you’re someone who skips meals regularly, or your mealtimes are all over the place and no day is the same, your body’s cortisol levels have likely risen, and your metabolism might be sluggish – all because your body is trying to maintain enough energy until you feed it again. Eating at regular intervals throughout the day creates a state of calm in the body, which supports healthy hormones and a vigorous metabolism.
5. Macronutrient balance is key. Macronutrients are things like fats, proteins and carbohydrates. Having a balance of all 3 is essential for healthy blood sugar regulation and feeling full after a meal. But many women have cut one macronutrient or another from their diets because of a particular diet (like keto or paleo), or because they fear one macronutrient is going to make them gain weight (like fats or carbs). Or, the quality of the macronutrient is poor, which makes the body want to eat more to make up for the nutrient deficit. The truth is, a healthy, balanced, high quality diet – even when you’re trying to lose weight – is the key to enjoying your food and feeling full after a meal.

Try these guidelines for how to eat for yourself and notice how they change things for you.

Notice if you feel less “diet driven” and more present for your body and your meal. Notice if it feels “different” or even “weird” to not restrict or hold back or deprive yourself, but to instead be present for your meal – with all of your senses blazing!

We have to relearn how to eat in a conscious, healthy, balanced and rhythmic way if we want to create a healthy and joyful relationship with our bodies and food.

We have to retrain our bodies to understand that they are safe in our care. That we will look after them. And that we will listen to what they need instead of ignoring and overriding them to follow the restrictive rules of a diet.