Last week I wrote a very timely article to share my thoughts and insights with you about the then upcoming solar eclipse, and the recent happenings in Charlottesville, Virginia. For a handful of reasons, that article didn’t get sent out in time, and I was left feeling disappointed that my efforts and creativity didn’t get to see the light of day.

Although you can read my article about a certain dynamic that’s playing out in spectacular fashion in the US here, my plans of sharing something that felt quite time sensitive were dashed. Things didn’t go according to plan, and I was reminded that when it comes to life, things seldom go according to plan!

What’s that quote? “We make plans and God laughs”… or something like that. Well, it’s often true that even with our best intentions and planning and exact implementation of said plan, life has its own organic timing, unfolding, and perfection. Knowing this, it’s best to have some ideas of what to do when things don’t follow the plan that you’ve laid out.

I used to think all I needed to do was create a backup plan to my original plan, but I’ve found something that feels far more liberating instead. I could spend my entire life trying to plan for every disaster, every chaotic moment, and every “what if”. And before I started to trust myself and the wisdom of life itself, I was very good at planning for every possible mishap and unexpected outcome.

But now I simply trust that I will know how to best respond when, and if, things go a bit – or a lot – sideways.

Here are the four steps I take when things don’t go according to plan:

1. The first thing I do is assess the situation. Can it be rectified? Is possible to “stick to the plan” even though something has gone awry along the way? Or would it actually be better for all concerned if a different approach, plan or idea was implemented at this time?

Knowing that it’s okay to change directions or course correct along the way is one way to liberate yourself from black and white thinking that things either need to be certain way, or no way at all.

Sometimes an unexpected change of plans is a gift in disguise. I’ve been amazed by the times when things didn’t go to plan, but turned out even better than I could have ever imagined it to be. Sometimes those little (or big) hiccups in a plan can be life’s way of reorganizing things for the better.

2. The second thing I do is ask myself “what action needs to be taken here?” Sometimes we need to act, and act quickly, to ensure that a mishap or miscommunication doesn’t then create a ripple effect that turns into a tidal wave of disaster. At other times, no action is needed at all because things just need to run their course.

The key here is to make that momentary discernment about what, if anything needs to happen, AND to also determine if you are the one that needs to act, or if that action could be better taken by someone else.

3. The third thing I do when things don’t go to plan is to celebrate what did go well. It’s easy to slop into thinking that it’s all “a wash” if things don’t go to plan, or even if the outcome isn’t what you hoped for or desired.

But inevitably, something good has come of things – even if it’s not what you expected. Maybe things failed in spectacular fashion, but as a result you were able to spend more time with your daughter, or on that side project you’ve been itching to get to.

Perhaps your plans fell apart, but in the process you found your sense of humor and some fresh ideas for something new.

The point I’m making here is that there is always a way to make lemonade out of lemons, and this step – celebrating what went well, or the good that came of things – is one that shouldn’t be overlooked.

4. The final step I take when things fall apart is to assess and evaluate everything that happened. If there is one thing I’m dedicated to doing, it’s learning from life and everything that happens along the way.

I don’t subscribe to the idea that failure is a bad or negative thing. On the contrary, it’s one of the best ways to learn and move forward in life! But when thing don’t go to plan, there’s almost always something that can be gleaned from that experience.

Asking questions like “What would I do differently next time?”, “What, if anything, would I do again?” “Am I proud of how I handled that, or would I want to deal with things in a different way next time?” “What did this situation teach me about myself?”

 

 

 

All of these questions are great ways to learn and prepare to be a better version of yourself in the future. These 4 steps aren’t meant to help you prevent or control what may or may not happen in the future, or whether or not things will go according to plan for you the next time.

What these steps will do is show you that no matter the outcome, there is an opportunity for you to learn and grow into a greater state of trust in yourself and in life itself.

This is where true freedom lies – in knowing that no matter what, you will make the most out of any situation, and that you’ll thrive in the face of life’s uncertainty, unpredictability, and chaos.

Remember that your life is meant to be enjoyed – even in those moments when things don’t go according to your plan. There is always a kind of perfection that is playing out in every moment and circumstance. I invite you to look for and trust in that perfection wherever you can.

Share with me below!

What do you do when things don’t go to plan? Do you naturally go through any of the four steps I’ve outlined above? Are there any steps that you’ve neglected?

I look forward to hearing from you!