What will they think if I take a break or take a nap or do something that delights me just because?

What will they say if I spend that money on myself – on something that’s extra nice, expensive even – something that makes me feel so pretty, special, and alive?

What will they think if I say no to their request – because it doesn’t feel good to me, it feels depleting, or it conflicts with that just-for-me appointment I made for myself?

What will they say if I buy myself flowers? Buy the cute shoes? The expensive handbag? Wear something extra fancy just because I want to?

What will they say if I send my meal back because it’s not to my liking or what I ordered in my exacting, specific way?

What will they think if I like being naked? I crave sex? I want to cook dinner for my lover wearing only an apron?

What will they say if they find out I’m taking an extra day off to meet some friends in Vegas for a girl’s weekend away?

What will they think if I change my mind? Decide to go a different way? Realize something is no longer working and want to choose something else?

What will they say if I cry? Or rage? Or authentically express what I’m feeling in the moment I’m feeling it?

What will they think if I decide to be honestly, truly, fully myself? In all of my messy, ever-changing, inconvenient, over-the-top bigness?

What will they say if I talk to my girlfriends on the phone for hours? Or take long hot baths while reading poetry? Or don thigh-high leather boots and my favorite lingerie to dance my a$$ off for the absolute fun and joy and ecstasy of it?

What will they think if I take my time? Slowly shower, shave my legs, do my hair and make-up to make sure look gorgeous?

What will they say if I decide to do things that feel good, not because they make “sense” but just because they give me goosebumps, make me giggle and leave a warm feeling in my belly?

What will they think if they see me in my car, belting out all the words to that song I love, being utterly caught up in a moment of pure joy and uncensored feeling?

What will they say if I flirt? Wear something sexy? Let my erotic energy express itself in healthy, unabashed, unapologetic ways?

They might say I’m selfish. Self-absorbed. Vain.

They might think I’m stuck up and full of myself. That I’m too needy and high maintenance. That nothing and no one will ever please or satisfy me.

They might say I’m dangerous, can’t be trusted, am only focused on myself, and am ruining my reputation.

They might believe I’m crazy and having a mid-life whatever you want to call it.

Or that I’ve lost my way, made a mess of my life, and am embarrassing myself, my family, my name.

But here’s the thing: People will think and say and believe whatever they will. None of us have any control over that, no matter how hard we try.

We can spend our precious time and energy contorting ourselves, trying to be everything to everyone, doing our very best to be good and accepted and perfect.

But that is living half a life. Not even half.

It is not our job to please and appease others or to make them feel comfortable or happy.

None of us will look back at our lives and wish we’d hidden more, dieted more, postponed pleasure more or succeeded at being more of what someone else wanted us to be.

What we will regret are all the times we didn’t live life more.

That’s because it’s our job to live life to the fullest, as often as absolutely possible.

Here is what I know:

I am here to live my life in a way that pleases me because it’s my responsibility to make myself happy.

I also know that the more permission I give to myself to live a life of my own design – a life that is full of LIFE! – the more it inspires and give other women permission to do the same.

Imagine a world where women everywhere are feeling lit up, supported, inspired, fulfilled, energized, turned on, confident, sexy, elated, and gratified…!

Then remember that this kind of world IS possible. It begins with you and the choices you make on your own behalf, every day.

So, when it comes down to it…

Choose pleasure.
Choose joy.
Choose daring.
Choose edginess.
Choose laughter.
Choose levity.
Choose truth.
Choose authenticity.
Choose happiness.
Choose YOU.

xx

 

PS: Here are 12 stories from 12 incredible women who dared to choose themselves – you can download The Art of Choosing Yourself storybook here.